The Gathering Approaches

Christmas will be here tomorrow and I am ready! For my immediate family, anyway. I am anticipating a good day tomorrow with my boyfriend S and my two MITs (Men In Training), aka my boys. I think the gifts that were chosen will go over well and they will be pleased.

On Saturday is my extended family gathering. We will have my mom (with Borderline Personality Disorder) and my dad (we just found out his carotid arteries are 100% blocked (yes, really) and his body developed 'collaterals' to keep the blood flowing. Stress can cause a chunk to break free and kill my dad. His femoral arteries are also blocked but I don't know how much. He is facing the possiblity of amputating the feet. The blockage could break free for no reason as well as stress). There will be my dad's sister (a psychologist by training but in her seventies. She's had a hard life but has persevered) as well. My older sister will be there (she has stage four breast cancer that's spread to her bones. She's on mucho pain medication and opiates. She also seems to think the world should cater to how she feels emotionally) and my younger sister (she believes she has Asperber's Syndrome, but I don't recall her being formally diagnosed by a psychiatrist and sees a family doctor for her needs. She said outright in an email that we should all try to change each other.) with her husband (not much to say on him) and 13 year old daughter (who is raising her mother) and her daughter's best friend. My S and boys will be there as well.

Now, let's take that group and make the gathering fun. My mom is trepiditious because I exploded last year saying I wasn't listened to. I have no intention of exploding now. Evidently, her psychologist has suggested we have a discussion circle to get to know each other where questions can be asked and we can each answer. My older sister took this idea and added rules to it. No offensive behaviour, no belittling, don't interrupt, be honest. Some of her rules are obvious and don't really need stating - of course we should be on our best behaviour. The problem arises when my older sister started fine tuning what kind of behaviour could not be exhibited. The kind of behaviour that makes me the person I am. So I took offense at that. If she doesn't like me (I know she loves me, she's my sister, but she doesn't like me as a human being) why should I have to change who I am to get her to like me?

Oh my good God, the gathering approaches.